After speaking to my parents in the morning, today I thought that mentally, I was prepared to hear the news. But, within few hours, when I saw my dad's number flashing on my mobile while driving, I suddenly felt cold and tired. After hearing the news, kept calling my family members just to relieve my restlessness.
Small things and incidents are deeply etched in my memory. She used to tell that as a preteen, I used to scare her by my tomboyish behavior. To tame me down, she put me in religious classes, where I was taught Suriya Namaskar and then transcendental meditation.
What a lady she had been! Her bluish gray eyes were warm and stern, and I used to long that at least my kid should inherit it. She was my first inspiration, especially in handling dire circumstances. She had unshakable faith that things will turn around as we wish.
Now, I realize the pangs of being an expat. It is a matter of few hours flight trip to home country, but due to our current plans, unable to go there and do my last rites, as the only granddaughter. This is what we choose, when we become expats.