Reality of Coming Home

This is my Competent Communicator Level 2 speech script (CC2) @ Toastmasters!

How many of you have lived outside India or out of your home town?

To me both the experience are more or less the same – to have a smooth transition I would say that you need to keep 3 important aspects in mind:

• Pace & prepare
• Setting right expectation
• Adaptation 

Like most of us, when I went to live abroad, I was all excited. This excitement alone helped me to cope up the new situation, in spite of not being prepared.

Our World Tuesday Blue

But the scenario dramatically changed when we came home as repatriates. We thought of giving ourselves some time to decide if we really wanted to stay back. 

While we were trying to figure out the right school for my daughter, I took up this new full time job after being a freelancer for more than 4 years. I was apprehensive about the work culture, in terms of timing and commuting. Suddenly, everything seemed too much for me, and the worst part is I was not prepared for what was in store for me, I just was overwhelmed. Even to take an auto or bus was a challenge because the dust and pollution was taking it’s toll on me. Some of you, R has seen my initial days in SW. How I used to get rashes and cough constantly. This was mainly because I was trying to rush things and get going. Instead of giving time, I thought that self- driving would help me to overcome the situation, without realizing that I would have road-rage.

It is all about expectations, I think I was having very high expectations on my driving skills. I was trying to follow road rules and be courteous on road, but I found everything on road was chaotic and couldn't believe that I used to ply the same roads without any difficulty! I was getting all worked up and swear that the road users had no civic sense. Basically, my expectations were incorrect and I was unable to cope up. When I tried discussing these issues with friends it was not well received. I was scorned and criticized that I was behaving as if am living in Chennai for the first time. If only I was more tolerant and set my driving expectations lower, I could have easily avoided getting into this reverse culture shock!

Once you know what to expect, adapting should be easy. But, since I was not tuned to setting expectations, adapting was also difficult. Usually, we do things habitually, so for anything and everything, we try to draw parallels based on our past experience. During my initial expat days, while shopping or be it vegetables or dresses, I used to convert Ringgit or pounds to Rupees and used to wonder why it is so expensive. When I came back, I had to re-learn in using rupees on a daily basis. I was getting all excited about how cheap things are. But, this excitement was taken as snobbishness and any casual remark was scorned. Finally, my mom did knock some sense in me by reminding that there is nothing to be excited about, and now, we were earning in Rupees and not in Ringgit!

See, everything boils down to preparing for the situation, setting right kind of expectation and adapting to the situation. Basically, when you are in Rome be a Roman. You can easily escape typical jibes of being labelled as ‘foreign returned’!

Note:

As soon as I saw the green card for 5 min indication…I rushed to finish and skipped to talk about this! So the speech had a tone as if am not happy to be back home. Actually I meant to close by telling how it is not always necessary to unlearn things that you have picked up as an expat!

Then, it doesn’t mean that you need to unlearn whatever you have learnt as an expat. For example, when a stranger smiles at me I used to turn back and see to confirm if they were actually smiling at me. Because, normally here I was not used to this simple act. But, now I still continue to smile at strangers too, without a second thought as a good will. 

Batu Caves

According to Hindu belief there is a saying that wherever there is a hill, lord Muruga resides. Batu Caves in Kula Lumpur is no exception to this belief. Early Hindu settlers of the 19th century made this beautiful natural limestone hills/caves as the abode of lord Muruga. Now, the 142 foot tall Golden Muruga stands majestically at the foot of the caves.



This is a holy worship place. But, some of the locals (non-Hindus) were treating the place as an exercise spot...so the temple management has put up a notice board to stop this kind of practices.



You need to climb 282 steps to reach the first level of natural caves. And, while hiking up you might feel breathless. But, the cool breeze that welcomes you at this height is so refreshing that you forget the tiredness.



Here, Moolavar or the main deity resides.



Then the second level is an open cave, again Muruga graces here in a different posture.

Batu Caves - Our World

Thai Pusam festival is celebrated annually in a large scale and it is declared as a public holiday! Even after a couple of weeks after this festival, the devotees throng to this place...



Look at the fantastic bird's eye view of Kuala Lumpur from the top of this hill.



Though going down the stairs is effortless, you need to be careful, as the steps are narrow and high. It is better to climb down in a zigzag fashion to make the descent easier.

Biking - Back to Nature

Cycling was the most cherished outdoor activity of my childhood. Outdoor, literally means out of the house door and on the road, but not in a natural surrounding! Those were the carefree days when I used to roam around the streets of my hometown during afternoons, that too without my dad's knowledge. The minute he finds out that am on roads, I would be grounded :(

Of late, the most enjoyable activity, was driving and exploring offbeat beaches and villages. But, during my last visit to Melaka my friends suggested that I could borrow a friend's cycle and join them for a ride in the neighborhood kampung (village in Malay). At that time I never knew what exactly was a bike ride. But, the passion to explore the unknown urged me to accept the offer, and I agreed to join them. When my friend commented that we take the simple route, it still didn't give me clue as to the distance or nature of the ride. I was in for a world of new and exciting experience.

Loaded for the ride! 

With great enthusiasm I packed my DSLR and the additional 70-300 mm lens too and assumed that the weight of the camera wouldn't matter, how naive of me!

After less than a KM in the kampung, we were trying to find the right direction to reach the river side and then frog farm, but we were lost in the fields.

Sky Watch

So we stopped by a traditional wooden Rumah Melayu (Malay house) to ask for directions.

As we went deeper, there was no road, we were riding in muddy paths and came by a river side and we were in for luck to see a stock of Storks!

Migratory Storks in transit!

Before I could think loud, my friend suggested that she clap so that I could catch them in flight!

By now, I started feeling the weight of my camera and requested my friend to carry it for me. After this, we came across a fenced building in the middle of nowhere...

Bird house

And we heard loud recorded chirps! I was told that this place was meant for birds to nest and that music was to attract them!!! Bird's nest is an expensive delicacy in Chinese cuisine. I can't begin to imagine why would people want to even destroy the nests:(
Within few meters was the frog farm, they are reared for food. Yes, frog is another Cantonese delicacy and frog leg soup is quiet popular! Well seeing them in large number in various stages of growth was something new and it was a feast for my camera:D

Tadpoles

  

Halfway from Tadpole to frog!

Babies (Shadow Shot Sunday)

Matured

Until I captured the above closeup, I never considered a frog to be a beauty!

After this, we headed deeper in the woods and stopped by a moderate hill. Now, my friend told that I could take my time and walk up the hill, while they ride up! I tried to test my limits..tripped and fell off the bike. But, I was giggling instead of getting shocked, I was totally carried away with the adventure. Well, except for minor bruises I was fine, so we went further to Pineapple farm and then rode through oil palm plantations...

Pineapple

Oil-palm plantation (SOOC)

On the way, we ran out of water supply, so we drove through village and stopped at a petty shop. Oh boy, I was so glad to see 100plus and just gulped it with greed. When we finished our ride, my friend checked her speed indicator and announced that we just completed 19KM ride and almost my jaw dropped at that!
If I was told about the distance before the ride, I'd have chickened out. Thank my lucky stars, and friends' patience, I did it!!! In fact, throughout the journey I had a silly grin like a child on a treasure hunt! Certainly, it is one of the most memorable trips.

Menara Lama Surau Tengkera

Several times I have driven through this minaret in Tengkera, Melaka.  Once, when I had my camera in my car, I bothered to pull up and take a good shot.

Oldest Mosque built in Melaka, 1728

Until I captured this, somehow I used to think that it was a light house, instead of mosque, as this area is known for land reclamation!

Palace of The Golden Horses

Be it in full polish or totally tarnished, one of my favorite statues in Selangor, Malaysia is the horse driven bronze cart placed in front of the luxury resort, Palace of the Golden Horses. 

Unfortunately, I haven't had a chance to get the detailed story behind this legendary looking beauty.

While I was trying to get a perfect shot, a Ferrari quickly entered my frame...

First I thought of deleting this imperfect shot, on second thoughts, it looked as if modern and ancient vehicles are in for a race!

Labuan - Chimney and WW II Memorials

When Airasia canceled their direct flights from Brunei to Kota Kinabalu (KK), (we had booked this flight about 6 months ago during promo), we were looking for other options to reach KK. It was a blessing in disguise! We decided to go to Labuan from Brunei by ferry Shuttle Hope, and then take MAS Wings to Kota Kinabalu.

Labuan is an union territory on Malaysia and is best known for its Japanese Surrender Point, which led to the end of 2nd World War and it is also a shoppers paradise because of duty free shopping.

As we arrived at the International Labuan Ferry Terminal, we noticed that the taxi stand was right in front. A local lady was kind enough to let us know that the island round would take less than 2 hours and recommended that we should bargain before getting into the cab. First cabbie demanded a flat RM100 for the sightseeing around the island, but when we spoke to the second, he said, if we booked for 2 hours, he could offer us RM 80! So we went with the 2nd cab offer and here is the virtual tour...

Coal mining started in Tanjong Kubong in 1844 and now only the chimney and some of the artifacts are preserved in The Chimney Museum at that location!

Locals call it 'punil'. 

This is located by the sea side.

Inner wall of the chimney shows no sign of burning. so there is a belief that this tower must have been used as a light house or a bell tower to announce the arrival of a ship.

visit to Japanese Surrender Point, which is at Layang-layang beach (South China Sea) in Labuan.

Japanese Surrender Point

This is where the Japanese surrendered to the Australian Imperial forces, which led to the end of World War 2. In this garden, there is also an inscription in memory of all those who sacrificed their lives in land and sea in and around Borneo Islands during WW 2.

Peace Inscription

With a heavy heart we proceeded to the World War II memorial, which has about 3900 burials of Australian and Indian regiments, who either died in the battlefield or at the Japanese prisoners of war camp from all over Borneo.

Cross of Sacrifice

The graves are symmetrical and looks like rows of peaceful soldiers waiting for command.

Most of these dead souls buried here were unidentified because the records were destroyed in the war camps. 

This pillar is in honor of the Indian Soldiers whose mortal remains were burned as per their religion

Terrible living conditions of the refuges in a ship from Poland described in Jeffery Archer's World War based Cane and Able flashed across when we were there. Reading the novel itself was disturbing, seeing in reality altogether was heart wrenching.

Exploring with a Friend @ Fraser Hills

After initial hiccups in planning, we succeeded in going to Fraser Hills (Pahang, Malaysia) with a friend's family. This also happens to be my first experience in hill driving. I had to pull up my car seat to almost 90 degrees and sit straight to get a better view at the bends and drive at a terribly slow pace, otherwise it was quite smooth.

Just about 90 KM from Kuala Lumpur it is hard to believe that such a peaceful and beautiful hill station exists.
My crazy partner prefers to stay indoors instead of exploring new places. Therefore, I've always had misgivings when we travel, and wondered how good it would be to travel with someone with same interest and at the same time comfortable to talk to. I guess my wish has been so strong that this time, I was blessed with wonderful experience and do things without having to argue!

View from our suite

Chirpy visitor at daybreak

Never realized moths can be colorful!

Hill view reflection

In this trip, the men and kids decided to stay indoors, where as my good friend and myself decided to 'explore' using the map. Both of us were not good in reading the map, but the town is too small, so it was rather easy to find our way.

Golf Course

Compared to the KL Butterfly park, here the butterfly park looked small and uninviting. Then the water park too was closed, but the view through the gates was fantastic.

Allen's Water - disused reservoir 

Though I enjoy walking in the jungle or plains, I do not look forward to climbing as I start sweating and loose my stamina quickly. However, when my friend urged to go on trekking, I agreed halfheartedly to take the shortest trail, but did not complete it:(

Ferns, berries, morning glory

After this disastrous attempt, we decided to drive further and see if there was anything interesting or you could just call it as 'wild goose chase'. And, we came across a viewing deck, so we pulled up to see. We saw the sign board to a waterfall and while we were considering to go there, we noticed a Caucasian stopping a car that was headed downhill and warn them of a landslide ahead.

Fish tailed palm

Watching us, a lady who was sitting nearby pointed at the Caucasian and told, 'my husband just walked to that waterfalls in the morning and he says that the roads are not good, but still the cars keep going!'. Now, I had to ask if he had taken any pictures. She assured that her husband would show us the pictures.
While taking out his camera, he told with a lighthearted banter that it took him 1 hour to go to the waterfall and 2 hrs to walk back! Soon, we learned that they were Australians and were on Malaysian roads for the past two weeks. Within few minutes we touched on various subjects such as Indian arranged marriages, waterfalls in Australia, 'grayed nomads' who cause traffic jams with their huge caravans, comparatively cheap Malaysian food price, peculiar habit of Malaysian bikers who wear the jackets as seen in the pic below (1st biker from right), lazy attitude of the staff at the resort where they were staying etc. It felt good to talk to strangers, without being stared at by my family.

Finally, we had to drag ourselves back to the resort, in the hope of coming back after a short break. But, later we were too tired and it was also rainy and getting dark, so we had to call it a day.Since childhood, going to hill stations has always been fun. Cool weather, smell of fresh grass, chillness in the air, curvy roads or um...whatever I've always felt romantic about hill stations. But, after this trip I would certainly vouch that traveling with a like-minded and understanding friend to a hill station is substantially gratifying without any romantic inclinations!

Turtle Watch @ Kemaman, Terengganu, Malaysia

It was an unplanned trip with short notice to Cherating, Pahang, Malaysia. Though i was aware of turtle watching in that area, I didn't know the details until I enquired @ Holiday Villa Resort, where we stayed. 

Though we booked to watch the turtles, we were told that the ranger would call us if there is a turtle landing at Telok Mak Nik in Kemaman, Terengganu, which is about 20KM from Cherating. We were lucky and the ranger picked us up around 9.30 pm and drove us to the site with another family. We had to walk about 80 mts in the deserted sparse jungle by the beach.

In hushed silence, we watched a turtle doing its reproductive process in the open beach below a muddy slope. The ranger lit a torch, without distracting the turtle, on the freshly laid eggs for for us to see.

Turtle laying eggs - unable to capture clear shot 

The ranger told that the whole process takes about 2 to 3 hours for the turtles, that includes selecting the nesting ground > digging the nest > laying about 70-140 eggs > closing the nest > go back to the sea!

As I was standing next to the ranger, I started talking to him and asked how do they scout for turtles. He told that there were 6 rangers working in that area, who are vigilant at nights on the look out for turtle landings. He walked us away from the crowd to show us the turtle mark on the beach.

Turtle mark 

He said, 'today you are seeing a green turtle and looking at the size it should be around 30 years old'. Actually, the green turtle looked blackish gray in that dim torch light. He further added, that each turtle might come to the same location for 6 or 7 times in the same season to lay eggs.

Closing the nest using rear flipperes

Another interesting fact I learned was that the turtles' gender would be decided based on the temperature of the nest. What we saw was considered as 'open beach' where the the nest was quite shallow with comparatively warm temperature, so if left naturally, it would produce female turtles.

The rangers dug out all the eggs, without disturbing the poor turtle, which was busy closing its nest. When I asked the rangers, why would they disturb this natural process, he told that they would take all these eggs to the hatchery where it would be safely hatched in about 6 weeks, thus protecting the species from predators and poachers.

Egg - flexible soft shell, resembling a ping-pong ball

In the mean time, another ranger brought freshly hatched baby turtles from the sanctuary so that we could release all of them at the same time.

2 hours old babies!

The ranger showed us how to hold a baby...

When the turtle completed its job and started to move towards the sea, the spectators in-spite of warning, used flash to capture this action. As turtles use moon/star light to find their way to the sea, this turtle got confused with the flash and started to move uphill! So, the ranger had to raise his voice among the crowd and then gently guide the turtle back towards the sea.

Trying to move towards light

Mission accomplished

Everyone cheered as it touched water and started to swim.

Home! 

Within seconds, the turtle was gone. It was an awesome, once in a life-time experience, which otherwise we get to see only in National Geographic or Discovery Channel!